super cool tumblr stuff

A compilation of some of my favorite things from Tumblr this month.

Mark Dorf

http://gnumblr.tumblr.com

Perfect pictures for an imperfect world.

super cool.

wow

NYCHOS

KiDMOGR∆PH

Sand, under a 250x microscope

how popcorn pops

Javier Perez: En Puntas

Same Pinup Girl Drawn in 15 Very Different Situations «TwistedSifter

"Her Memories of a Dream" featuring Minori

100 days left!

Alright, so I've made TONS of to-do lists before, some left unpublished, but I'm going to try and take this one seriously, as I turn 18 in 100 days! Some things will be crossed off, as I've already done them from my previous "bucket" lists. I'll come back and add things too!

100 days left of being a minor... weird...

UPDATED 3/16/2014 (hey... i just now remembered to come back to this, okay?)

1. Stay up for 24 hours.
2. Sit on a roof.
3. Go to see a movie with friends. (I never go to the theater because it's so expensive ughghg)
4. Fix my room up.
5. Make a list.
6. Get straight C's or higher on a report card. (it's quite difficult for me to do this nowadays)
7. Have a yard sale. (I definitely could use some cash.)
8. Watch a sunrise and a sunset on the same day.
9. Wear a dress shirt, dress pants, and tie when/(if) I go out. (crossdressing, my fave.) hell yeah
10. Skip school for a day and go out with the 'rents.
11. Go somewhere new (to me) in the city.
12. Dye my hair.  dark purple!
13. Write a secret letter to someone.
14. Read a coming of age novel.
15. Read something from my "to read" list. Q and A by Vikas Swarup. the inspiration for Slumdog Millionaire!
16. Watch something from my "to watch" list.
17. Draw something inspired by a book or movie. I started a drawing of Walter White from Breaking  Bad! I'll upload it when (if) I'm done!
18. Write a short story. (which, by the way, I should be doing a lot more of since I'm in creative writing -_-)
19. Use a fake accent at a restaurant. I used a fake name, is that close enough? No? I'll do it!
20. Be in a magazine. (I made an appearance in my city's magazine this month!)
21. Try a new dish/dessert. (...okay, so I already did this one too. Popping boba, anyone?)
22. Go to a homecoming game. (Even if you're not a big sports person, this is fun to do with friends.)
23. Set off fireworks.
24. Find a new band to add to my favorites.
25. Take the county bus and visit another town.
26. Invite someone to my house. (doesn't happen often) MY FRIENDS CAME OVER, MOST FOR THE FIRST TIME, ON MY 18TH BIRTHDAY! YEEEE!!!!
27. Sleep in just underwear. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)‎
28. Create a new dish.
29. Make a new acquaintance.
30. Bring in sweets to share with friends at school my lemon bars are yummy, they tell me. :)
31. Be called something affectionate by someone who isn't my mom or dating me. On the contrary, I should call others cute things more often!
32. Go for a walk around the city.
33. Buy something fancy.
34. Go to dinner with friends.
35. Dress up for Halloween. pirate's life for me
36. Learn to parallel park.
37. Bake myself a cool cake for my 18th birthday!!! (not completed, but it's too late now lol) I don't think we even had cake, but we did cut a giant gummy bear into pieces!

for twenty-year-olds who have never been loved

By the way this is important to me, and it is a wonderful piece of writing. This is one of few things that makes me cry every single time I read it.

All of a sudden two decades have passed and you still have not kissed anyone with tongue, or kissed anyone at all for that matter, or had a 3 AM conversation with someone who would rather look into your eyes for ten minutes straight than talk. You have never worn a lover’s sweater or “forgotten” it at home in your bedroom just so you would have an excuse to see them again. You have never even stood face-to-face with someone who makes your hands shake so hard it feels like they’re both having a separate anxiety attack. 

This causes you much guilt and self-blame and sadness but above all, an overwhelming curiosity. Are you really that ugly, that unwanted, thatuninteresting, that boring, that no one, absolutely no one, has ever looked at you like the only thing on earth? 

The answer is no. The better answer is that someone out there, somewhere in the world, is “wondering what it’s like to meet someone like you,” and they have two decades worth of love stored in their veins like a shoot-‘em-up drug, and they’re just about ready to inject it into someone else’s bloodstream. All you have to do is roll up your sleeves and wait for it to happen. 

At times you felt so lonely you could stand at the edge of a cliff with nothing beneath you but air and grass and a long, long way down, and you’d still feel emptier than that canyon itself. Maybe you even danced with yourself alone in your room a few times, arms outstretched around a ghost, pretending someone else’s hands were on your waist, someone else’s eyes boring into yours. 

Or maybe you fell temporarily in love with strangers on public transportation, fell in love with anybody who so much as accidentally brushed your hand on the way past. For you, falling in love with dozens of people a day was a coping mechanism for not having anyone to love you in return. But people are not eggs and falling in love with a dozen of them does not mean your shell will remain uncracked. One day you’re going to hit the point where you’re so desperate for human contact that you’re going to snap in half and all your love will bleed out like egg yolk.
But someone out there is eating a bowl of Ramen noodles right now, or putting on slippers, or settling into bed. They are doing all the normal things that you’ve done in your own life. They are just like you. They have cellulite and extra fat in all the wrong places and goals and fears and doubts and bad handwriting. 

The truth is that they are just like you, and being just like you, they’re looking for a lover too. They’re what you might call a soulmate. 

They think they’re all alone in feeling the way they do, but you’re really both two halves of a whole. 

And one day you’ll meet them, bump into them on the street, and your two halves will be put together, and you’ll make one.

source: http://writingsforwinter.tumblr.com/post/54484155702/for-twenty-year-olds-who-have-never-been-loved

It gives me great hope and I hope you like it.

yet another big rant/feelings sesh/thing

Of burdens and bees

It's funny.. In English class we've learnt that bees and flowers are symbolic of sex and love and whatnot. So I'm sitting on my front porch thinking about lost loves and loves that never were, and out of the corner of my eye I spot a bee that just keeps flying into the wall. This has been going on for a while now.

I can relate, little bee. I can relate.

Kittens

I went to the Pet Store today.

CNN Student News

Very frustrate
Very sad

So I take pictures to feel better

The Letter that Scared Us All

I fucking hate everything. How about I just don't exist? My family doesn't either. I'll start over new. How nice would that be. I'm paying for things I didn't even do. Maybe I deserve this, maybe I don't, maybe I deserve much worse. Land of the free, my ass. I'll be free when I'm dead.

what the heck??????

So I've apparently lost my entire following list? I can't remember most of the URLs I was following since I haven't checked this blog on a laptop in weeks, so I'm sorry!

If you have commented on my blog before or if I have commented on yours or you remember me following you, please notify me in the comments! I miss you all!

School struggles

The title says it all. I miss you, blog!