the life of michelle: All so quickly

Saturday, April 14, 2012

All so quickly

Hmm... I haven't been assessing my thoughts and feelings as much as I used to. I'm also an overall happier person than I was a few weeks ago. I like life now. I just wish I could hang out with my friends more often. I'm in my teenage years. This is when I'm supposed to be doing stupid things and going crazy, messing up and learning from it. But I don't even hang out with my friends that often. I wish we could go to the movies, have a picnic, host our own nerd parties, where we won't get wasted and smoke weed and have orgies like other kids do (*sigh* I've overheard their stories.), but just have fun and be ourselves and not worry/think about school or the rest of our lives. I don't like staying here, at home. I get to see enough of my family as it is; I think I'm just getting sick and tired of spending time with them, all the time. It sounds mean, I know, but it's true. Summer is going to be boring and lonely as hell, and I really need money, so I'm thinking of getting a job. It's scary out there. I'm horrified of growing up. I'm going to have to enter the rest of my life, sooner than I ever expected. Everything I've ever learned and all my life skills, ready to be put into action for what is my real life to come. I only have two years left of high school... I want to take control of my own life and make the most of it.

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Song Quotes

"We'll all float on."
"Sometimes all I really wanna feel is love. Sometimes I'm angry that I feel so angry. Sometimes my feelings get in the way of what I really feel I needed to say."
"And we will never be alone again, 'cause it doesn't happen every day... kinda counted on you being a friend. Can I give it up or give it away? Now I thought about what I wanna say, but I never really know where to go so I chained myself to a friend, 'cause I know it unlocks like a door."
"My gears, they grind more each day, and I feel like they're gonna grind away. And the city blocks, they drive me wild, they're never ending, mile after mile. I just don't know what to do, I'm too afraid to love you."
"It's only in your head you feel left out or looked down on.."
"Think of me, think of me fondly when we've said goodbye. Remember me, once in a while, please promise me you'll try."
"I'd rather be a comma, than a full stop."
"We all need somebody to lean on."
"Someday, I will be strong enough to lift not one, but both of us."
"Nothin' lasts forever, and we both know hearts can change."
"I took my love down to violet hill... There we sat in snow. All that time she was silent still, said 'If you love me, won't you let me know?'"
"Flames to dust, lovers to friends, why do all good things come to an end?"
"If you're lost you can look and you will find me... time after time. If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting... time after time."
"If every second counts on a clock that's tickin', gotta live like we're dying."
"At night when the stars light up my room, I sit by myself, talking to the moon... trying to get to you. In hopes you're on the other side, talking to me too.. Or am I a fool who sits alone, talking to the moon?"
"Pretty, pretty, please, if you ever, ever feel like you're nothing.... you are perfect... to me."
"I want love to roll me over slowly, stick a knife inside me, and twist it all around. I want love to grab my fingers gently, slam them in a doorway, put my face into the ground."
"But I'm a freak, I'm a weirdo... What the hell am I doing here?!? I don't belong here..."
"You use your heart as a weapon, and it hurts like heaven."
"I don't mind spending everyday out on your corner in the pouring rain. Look for the girl with the broken smile, ask her if she wants to stay awhile. And she will be loved..."