Stay Strong.

So many things going on in my life... Problems, problems, everywhere. School, friends, family.. life in general. I've been on the cusp for weeks now. I try to not let people notice. Some days I hide it better than others. Other days I want to blow up, scream at the top of my lungs, punch everything and everyone, and run away and cry myself to sleep on a park bench, alone, where I can worry about no one and nothing but myself.

There is like, a cancer pandemic, or something. I know so many people with cancer now. My brother told me today that his old elementary school friend died of cancer. The kid was 13. And he just said it casually.

Does it bother anyone else that this is becoming just a normal part of life? People are supposed to die old and peacefully. Not by cancer, out of all things. My best friend's grandparent also has cancer. I don't know whether to tell him to hang on or let go. I know it hurts either way. It bothers me to see him so worried and out of it. I wish I could do something but I feel so useless. But I know that that all I can do is at least be there if he ever needs me. I trust in him, and I hope he can come to me when he needs someone...

My mom's old friend's daughter of 12 years of age is still recovering from leukemia. This young girl, who had to worry about which wig to pick out for school. Each birthday party celebrated like it was going to be her last. Worried about medical expenses and the life she lived. Fortunately, her hair has grown back and her cancer is gone, and she has a baby sister to take care after. I'm happy for her. Whatever happens, happens. I don't want to live in the past but I don't want to have to worry about the future. Stay strong, my loves. Stay Strong.

(The title of this post comes from Demi Lovato, who got a tattoo of the words "Stay Strong" on her wrists after getting out of rehab. It's something that makes me want to keep going, something I live by everyday.)

-ExperiencedNovice